12.5 weeks

Tomorrow I have a detailed ultrasound with a specialist and my doctor said there's a good chance they will be able to tell us your genders at this appointment! We are excited to find out. (Although your dad kind of likes not knowing because once we know, we will know the genders of everyone in our family and there will be no more guessing...since you two are definitely our last kids. But I am all about knowing and being prepared.) I am kind of thinking boy / girl but I know whatever your genders are, you are being sent to us intentionally and that makes me happy. I have definitely felt a lot of peace concerning you and your sibling joining our family and I'm grateful for that because it definitely seems a little overwhelming at times too.

Here's a little update:

Stretch marks: Nothing new from this pregnancy yet. 

Sleep: I am still able to sleep fine as long as everyone sleeps through the night. Sometimes I wake up to pee but sometimes I ignore that feeling because I'm just too tired.  

Best moment last week: My ultrasound last week when I got to see you both on the screen again. Twin B was very active during the ultrasound. You both have good, strong heartbeats at 150.

Movement: Sometimes I think I might feel a little something but I'm not sure. It seems too soon to really feel anything yet. 

Food cravings: I still crave fresh, healthy things but along with that I'm also craving chocolate and sweets. I'm trying to lean more towards the healthy cravings but it doesn't always happen. Peanut butter and honey sandwiches (with banana) sound good a lot recently too. 

Gender: I'm so curious to know! There is a good chance we will find out tomorrow!!!

Baby Stats: You're each supposed to be about 3 inches long now (about as long as a pea pod) and weigh an ounce. It's hard to believe you're both so little because my belly is sure getting bigger. 

Symptoms: I am still really tired but I'm trying to get more sleep at night and that is helping a little. 

Labor signs: Nope (thankfully). 

Belly button - in or out? It's still mostly in. 

What I miss: Feeling less exhausted and having more energy than I do now.

What I am looking forward to: My detailed ultrasound tomorrow and hopefully finding out your genders!

11 Week Update

Stretch marks: Nothing new from this pregnancy yet. 

Sleep: I am still able to sleep fine if Josh and Eleanor stay asleep all night. Right now Miss Eleanor wakes up in the night sometimes because she's getting her molars and Josh occasionally still has night terrors (or sometimes an accident), but they are pretty infrequent now. 

Best moment last week: My ultra sound on Thursday - the day I found out we're having twins!!!! We're very excited (and nervous and overwhelmed too).

Movement: Not yet. 

Food cravings: Yesterday nectarines sounded really good. Salads, fresh veggies sandwiches, ice water with fresh lemon juice squeezed into it. I sometimes buy (healthy) frozen meals to eat quickly if it's a crazy busy night but those don't sound appealing at all. I was this way when expecting Oliver, too. Except with him, literally all I wanted was fresh veggie subs. 

Gender: I'm so curious to know! Extra curious because it could be girl, girl or boy, boy or girl, boy. It would kind of be fun to have one of each but I don't have any super strong feelings or preferences other than I think maybe two girls could be difficult for Eleanor (she might feel left out due to the bond twins have) but it might not be that way at all. I also think two boys would be a handful if they're anything like their brothers. But I also feel strongly that these babies are definitely being sent to our family with intention and whatever your genders, you're supposed to be with us and I feel peace about that. 

Baby Stats: You're each supposed to be about the size of a fig. That's so hard to believe, just because you look bigger on the ultrasound and I feel like my stomach is making lots of room for you two. 

Symptoms: I am incredibly tired. I do okay in the mornings but I am really dragging in the afternoons. If I sit down on the floor to change a diaper, I have to lay down and I almost fall asleep. If I sit on the couch, I do fall asleep, even if only for ten minutes. I have low energy the second half of the day. I just found out I have low thyroid levels so hopefully the medication will help with this (I just started taking it today). I have not felt sick at all in weeks. I did a little bit, in the beginning, but it was very mild and short and would usually happen in the afternoons or evenings. There was only twice when I thought I really might actually throw up and almost ran to the bathroom. Otherwise it was just a mild, annoying feeling that passed within minutes. I am so grateful I'm not feeling sick and feel it's a tender mercy from Heavenly Father because I have so much on my plate right now with the other kids. On occasion I get a little lightheaded / dizzy but I think that might be due to low thyroid levels as well.  

Labor signs: Nope (thankfully). 

Belly button - in or out? It's still mostly in. 

What I miss: Feeling less exhausted and having more energy than I do now.

What I am looking forward to: My next appointment next week so I can hear your heart beats and see you on the screen again. Being of Advanced Maternal Age (37), I am high risk for misscarriage so it's always nice to hear those heart beats. I also get to have appointments (including an ultrasound every time) every two weeks because I'm having twins, so that's kind of fun. 

10 Weeks

11.5 weeks

My first letter to you.

Dear Baby,

On December 7, 2016, I found out I was pregnant with you. [copy from journal...]

Exciting news!!!

Four days ago, I went to my second dr. appointment since finding out I was pregnant. At the first appointment, my doctor did an ultra sound because I'm high risk (due to my age) and she wanted to make sure everything looked okay. Everything looked good. So this was my second ultra sound with this pregnancy. Dr. Roberts started the ultra sound and then said, "Hmm, wow" or something similar. "Is something wrong with the baby?" I asked. "Look at the screen," she said. "You're having twins!" The shock on my face must have been very obvious. I wish I had a picture of it to share. I never, ever thought we would have twins. It was definitely the furtherest thing from my mind, especially since I already had an ultrasound that showed one baby. I honestly couldn't even process it. She grabbed my phone from my bag for me and I took a picture of the screen (the first picture shown here). I then recorded your heart beats. I couldn't wait to tell your dad (I was alone at the appointment because I thought this was a routine thing so I didn't see any reason for him to be there). I don't remember what else I thought while laying on that table, other than it felt like a dream and I felt like I would be waking up any minute. I told Dr. Roberts that. She said, "I know your mind is racing but this is God's will for your family and babies are a blessing. You can do this." Then she hugged me. (It is rare to hear a doctor say that but it was exactly what I needed to hear. I love my doctor so much. She's amazing!)

I this image, the baby on the left is head up and the baby on the right is head down. 

I called your dad after the appointment and he was so shocked, he swore (which is rare for him). It wasn't in a bad way, or because he doesn't want you or your sibling, but just out of shock. I called him at work, asked him if he was sitting down, and then I told him. He said he felt happy, excited and scared out of his mind. I pretty much feel the same. I also feel very overwhelmed. But I can't wait to find out your genders and meet you both! Grandma Utah was in town visiting, so I got to go home and tell her in person. I showed her the ultrasound picture and she said, "Are there two?!?" She started jumping up and down and screaming in excitement. The night I told her I was pregnant, she said she thought it would be twins. I thought she was crazy and didn't give it a second thought but she was right. (My stepmom, Dot, also told me she wondered if I was having twins when she saw me at Christmas and has been having dreams about twins and seeing them everywhere she goes. My friend Emily Poland [who has twins herself] also thought this. I ran into her at Banner Health the day I had my first ultrasound and I told her I was pregnant and she asked me if I was having twins because it just popped into her head.)

It's easy to feel overwhelmed and a little nervous, especially because we already have three young, active, demanding children. But as I sat in the ultrasound room, waiting for Dr. Roberts to come back after I got dressed, I felt the Spirit and knew this was right for our family. It will be very difficult but what a blessing! I am so excited to meet these amazing spirits whom Heavenly Father gave us such strong promptings about.

Love, Mom